Saraphir Camille

Someone out there knows
how you take your coffee now;
someone out there knows
if you now like white or red;
someone out there knows
if the same things make you frown,
if you still have the same two lines on your forehead.

Someone out there knows
if you still rant at awful drivers,
or if you learned to take breath
and simply let them be;
someone out there knows
if your temper still runs hot now;
someone out there feels it
but it’s no longer me.

I no longer know
and most days I am grateful;
I no longer know
but some days I’m still sad.
I no longer know
I stayed so long
when it was so wrong,
I guess the good things made it hard to go.

Someone out there knows
if the years have helped you mellow,
someone out there knows
if ageing helped you see;
someone out there knows
if you learnt to show your feelings,
or if you still can’t hold a hand
- but maybe that was just with me.

I no longer know
and most days I am grateful;
I no longer know
but some days I’m still sad.
I no longer know
I stayed so long
when it was so wrong,
I guess the good things made it hard to go.

Someone out there knows
if they might go the distance,
someone out there knows
if they might run like me;
someone out there’s waiting
to wake up and remember
that nothing in this life
is worth your loss of dignity.

For now I know
and most days I am grateful;
yes, now I know,
but some days I’m still sad;
but mostly cause I know
that it took too long
to see how much was wrong
the few good things made it hard to go.

A bit of extra time each day 
to do the things that matter,
and not get stuck on Instagram 
absorbing mental clutter.

A bit of extra time each day 
to stop and smell the flowers,
and not let all the screens and apps
drain my creative powers.

A bit of extra time 
to ponder what life means;
To remember what's my purpose
to delve beneath the surface;
A bit of extra time 
to grow into my dreams. 

As well as extra time 
I need to free my imagination -
release the inner critic 
and my self-limitation.

Instead of extra time 
I need no more procrastination -
no distractions or banalities 
to diverge my destination. 

A bit of extra time 
to ponder what life means;
To remember what's my purpose
to delve beneath the surface;
A bit of extra time 
to grow into my dreams. 

Time is not a constant,
time does not come free;
What will I barter or give up 
to achieve my chosen destiny?

A bit of extra time 
to ponder what life means;
To remember what's my purpose
to delve beneath the surface;
A bit of extra time 
to grow into my dreams. 

I let you think I’m keen
because I couldn’t be clear;
I let you think I’d stay
because I wanted someone near;
I let you think it’s love
though it clearly just was lust;
I let it carry on too long,
but end it now I must.

I let your soul grow flowers,
I let your heart grow hope,
I let your mind grow futures
all felled in a single stroke.

I let you dream tomorrow,
when today was never sure;
I let your heart build secret rooms
where you wanted mine to tour;
I let you plant a garden
where you wanted me to root;
I let a seed start growing
that I knew could never fruit.

I let your soul grow flowers,
I let your heart grow hope,
I let your mind grow futures
all felled in a single stroke.

Sorry if I deceived you
I never meant to lie
I guess I just kept trying because
I couldn’t bear to make you cry.
It’s not that it was bad
it just didn’t feel like home,
and I realised my garden
would be better grown alone.

I let your soul grow flowers,
I let your heart grow hope,
I let your mind grow futures
all felled in a single stroke.