I’m losing hair like crazy, from the top of my head. I’m looking more like a monk, that's what my wife said. Got hemorrhoids on my bottom, no hair at the top. My middle part is bulging out and it don’t seem, to stop.
I take ten pills every morning, eight and a half every night. They say that keeps me living and makes me feel all right. I had four bypass surgery, one kidney is gone. When I go to bed at night, I wake up five times before dawn.
My right foot stays numb and the left one hurts like hell. My legs ain’t worth a poop and now both feet swell. I can only walk a hundred feet before I stop and rest. I ask the doctor what this is, he said he’ll run some tests.
I’ve been tested for my heart, I’ve been tested for my stress. It all seems so simple, I’m just an awful mess. I’ve been tested for diabetes, I’ve been tested for AIDS. The only thing the tests don’t show is how I got this way.
Well I almost hit someone with my car the other day. So I went to the eye doctor, here’s what he had to say. He said you got a problem, you can’t even read the big E. He gave me lens like coke bottles, just so I could see.
So I started wearing glasses. Got headaches all the time. I’m buying Valium by the gross, but I’m Having a good time. I Don’t know where I’ve been and I care less what I got. So in the end drugs are good, as long as you take a lot.
It’s pure hell too get old, and I’m hitting 74. I feel like I’m a hundred, sometimes even more. I’m too old to cut the mustard and my memories out of wack, if I made love right, I’d die from a heart attack.
I got pain in my both shoulders, a kink in my lower back. My tailbone doesn’t feel so good and buddy that’s a fact. Got wrinkles on my face and God knows where else. I’m taking so many pills, but they never seem to help.
Well I’m sick of seeing doctors, I’m sick of all their tests. MRI’s, EKG's, CT’s and all the rest. Got one foot on a banana peel and the other one’s in the grave. Oh Lord it’s just pure hell, when you gotta live this way.
Well I sang this song for my wife, she said you covered a lot. You told about your aches and pains, but there’s something you forgot. On both sides of your head, what are those things for. You better get your ears checked, you don’t hear good any more.
This is final verse of the song that I wrote. I’m now a senior citizen, yeah, another old goat. I’m laying here in my tub, and you know I think I’m stuck. If I yell loud enough, someone might help me up.
It’s pure hell too get old, and I’m hitting 74. I feel like I’m a hundred, sometimes even more. Got one foot on a banana peel and the other one’s in the grave. Oh Lord it’s just pure hell, Oh Lord it’s just pure hell, when you gotta live this way.
