LYRIC FOR SALE

By Ironwood Road

[Verse 1 – origin story, light humor, subtle betrayal]
We brought that dog home from the county pound,
Little ball of fur just sleepin’ around.

But as he got older, he got wise to the game—
Started runnin’ you like a runaway train.

Now he struts around like he owns the place,
Shootin’ me that look like, “Move over Ace.”

[Pre-Chorus – realization, rising frustration]
I ain’t sayin’ I’m jealous, but I ain’t blind—
That dog moved up… and I got left behind.

[Chorus – sarcastic, catchy, calling it out]
Girl, if you’d treat me like you treat that dog,
I’d be the happiest man you ever saw.
You scratch his head, let him run the house,
I say one wrong word—and I’m on the couch.

He don’t work, don’t pay no bills,
Still gets your love and always will.
It ain’t that hard, I ain’t askin’ for much…
Why can’t I get treated like that mutt?

[Verse 2 – full rivalry, escalating frustration, comedic contrast]
He comes home muddy, rollin’ in the yard,
You scoop him up laughin’, “Ain’t you somethin’, boy?”
Run him a bath, dry him off slow,
Wrap him up like royalty, head to toe.

Stretch him out in my chair like it’s his damn throne,
Bring him his food like he runs this home.

I come home late from workin’ overtime,
Dead on my feet, just tryin’ to make a dime.
Say I pulled somethin’, my back’s real sore—
You say, “Band‑Aids are in the bathroom drawer.”

(spoken, confused)
Band‑Aids…Huh!

And that dog looks at me like he knows I’m done…
Noddin’ his head like, “Yeah, buddy… I already won.”

[Pre-Chorus – stronger realization, feeling replaced]
I ain’t askin’ for much, just a little fair play—
But that dog moved up and I’m gettin’ replaced.

[Chorus – sarcastic, stronger delivery]
Girl, if you’d treat me like you treat that dog,
I’d be the happiest man you ever saw.
You scratch his head, let him run the house,
I say one wrong word—and I’m on the couch.

He don’t work, don’t pay no bills,
Still gets your love and always will.
It ain’t that hard, I ain’t askin’ for much…
Why can’t I get treated like that mutt?

[Bridge – emotional peak, angry outburst, confrontation]
He’s layin’ on my side of the bed tonight,
All stretched out smug like everything’s right.
I try to squeeze between him and you real slow—
He lifts his head and growls—“Buddy… NO.”

I finally snap, say, “He’s gotta go!”
You sit up straight like, “Oh really?… NO.”
Now I’m headin’ to the couch with my pillow—
He’s starin’ me down, noddin’ like, “Told you so.”

[Instrumental Break, 2‑bar guitar lick only. 2 bars max. No extended solo.]

[Final Chorus – big energy, resigned frustration, humorous payoff]
Girl, if you’d treat me like you treat that dog,
I’d be the happiest man you ever saw.
You scratch his head, let him run the house,
Now he’s in our bed… and I’m on the couch.

He don’t work, don’t pay no bills,
Still gets your love and always will.
It ain’t that hard, I ain’t askin’ for much…
Why can’t I get treated like that mutt?

[Outro – Short outro, no extended pauses, no long fade.]
Yeah… now he’s curled up warm where I should be…
And I’m on the couch—yeah, that’s where you put me.