The right direction
By Craig Delta
I don't understand why I'm feeling the way I do
Every day it just feels like its pouring rain down on me
The pain it still remains whether things are bad or good
Why do I suffer in silence when this noise inside my head is causing me such grief, an emotion so deeply ingrained beneath.
Don't be mad at me if I don't return your call, you see I'm feeling out of this world, stuck in turmoil, a tornado, a twister my mind is a mixture of darkness and light but unfortunately, the light just isn't too bright
I try to hide it but my face cannot deny it
Let's kick mental illness in the arse because I'm falling at an ever-increasing rate, I need this to pass.
Even when calm my palms are sweating and I feel like I can't breathe, the demon I plead please to leave me be.
You tell me to cheer up, well it's easy if you know how, when you're not suffering from a debilitating illness, a disease of the mind yet even though I'm looking fine on the outside, the inside is a deep mine full of trash and treasure.
I long to find the right direction, a laughing infection that I still cannot embrace.
Some say you're just a joke, looking for attention and lacking the affection and empathy to my recollection, no care but rejection, you see my battle like my nemesis is invisible and incredible, I'm far from infallible.
This illness is horrible, like an affliction of addiction and I'm sometimes on a mission to cause personal pain and self-harm, it's an infection.
One day will come to pass, I may make it or I will pass, before you judge, have an open mind and read within the muddy boot tracks following down my line.